CHOOSE YOUR ATTITUDE

‘Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves’. – Viktor E. Frankl.

When I read the book – MAN’S SEARCH FOR MEANING - a few years back, little did I know that people would be fearing for their life again but this time all around the world. Year 2020 was tough for the World, but the Year 2021 has been devastating for India in particular. But what can we do? We still have the same 24 hours in a day and a life to live. How long the life would be - I don’t know but how strongly we can face a tough situation depends all on our attitude towards life. There is a saying - what has started has to end one day. So, it is for sure that our end is also certain, but the question is when? The answer is not known to the most intelligent people on the globe. What is even a bigger question to me - why do you even worry about that day? Just live in the moment – it might be your last, yes it might just be. COVID or no COVID what is the guarantee that one shall be alive to see the next moment. There is none – at least I cannot give, neither for myself nor for anyone else and I am sure no human can. So why worry so much about the fatalities caused by COVID. Learn to Fight to Survive – survive for the reason that you choose to live everyday for. It could be for yourself, your family, your pet, the person you love, your business or job – anything that keeps you going. Just Live for That Reason. Friedrich Nietzsche once said, ‘He who has a why to live can bear with almost any how.’

In the last couple of weeks all that we are hearing in the news channels is shortage of medical oxygen in national capital and other parts of the country and shortage of beds plus black marketing of just about everything related to healthcare – ranging from hospital beds to even the medicines required. With hearing all this and the fact that it is true, the mind tends to get on the negative track and I have heard from so many people that they are fearing for their life and also of their loved ones. One of my old friends who lives with her parents called me & said – I don’t know what I would do if my parents got the disease – how would I run around and look for hospital beds or oxygen. She went on to say – what if I got the disease, then I shall be a pain for my parents, what will the old people do. My wife told me that her friend called her the other day saying that her husband woke up in the middle of the night just to give her all the bank account details and the medical & life insurances in case anything happened to him. He could not even wait for the morning to tell her. This is the level (what I have heard) we people have got scared. But the fact of the matter is that we have to fight and face the consequences – consequences of our lack of discipline because whatever you say one thing is for sure – we have to respect this disease COVID. Respect and also honor the discipline that we have to have in our life now to be safe from it. Without respecting and understanding its potency we cannot safeguard ourselves because the day we feel it is ineffective we shall make a mistake and thereafter end up paying heavily. Furthermore, if anything happens – we have to fight, with all that we can. Fight for our lives or the family members – simple. The aim should be to survive. Roger Federer once said, ‘I fear no one, but respect everyone.’ Time to respect but not be afraid.

My point is – don’t be afraid of death & from tough situations that may arise to save a life, a loved one’s life. Do your best as that is what you can do best – rest is not in your hands. Live Life till you are alive – die only once and not every moment. Have a never give up attitude.

DON'T FORGET WHEN THE TIME COMES

We, The People of India, have short memory. History has proved this very well. But then what will we do even by having a good memory? Before that – what is the relevance of even asking this question and that too at this stage when the country is going through a catastrophe? The relevance is there – the very fact that we have not been able to get the basic facilities that we as humans deserve by the people we have elected to lead/govern us ever since independence has big role to play in the current day medical fiasco that we are witnessing. So, does that mean that the government is to be blamed for the deaths and the pain people are going through because of the COVID 19 second wave? No, I didn’t mean that at all. What I meant is that we have to learn from this moving forward. Learn so that what we and those departed souls have suffered now should not be a repeat exercise for us or our future generations.

Learning and implementing for me is self-improvement. Improvement of my thoughts, my vision and my decisions. This, if followed by the mases shall result in a more developed and more practical society. Today on social media all that we read is that our Prime Minister should resign and he is the sole responsible person for the ills that we are suffering. The rallies that he conducted in West Bengal for the sole purpose of winning the elections, the Kumbh Mela are the foundations of the current scenario. Why should only the PM resign? Why not the CMs and the other political & religious leaders? Why were there parties and/or gatherings (of majorly all the religions in India) going on when we knew that we have not yet come out of this pandemic? Was it only the PM who conducted rallies? Not the leaders of the other party/ies who were also contesting the elections? Till when are we going to or let people with such thoughts to encash the hidden agenda in exchange? Some, even go on to say that – make them (politicians) pay when the next elections come the way they have made us suffer in getting medical oxygen and hospital beds. My question to such people is – how will you make them pay? By not exercising your vote? Still someone shall win – but what is the guarantee that the winner would be a better leader? Or we make them pay by selling our vote? Seriously? Have we reached a level that we would charge for all the deaths and our pain? Forget about whether selling our vote is legal or not – legality has gone for a toss in the last 3 weeks or so – but just imagine someone who lost a family member – are we proposing that s/he should sell that loss at a premium? Come on think of it – are these logical solutions to the problem that we face? Would such an ideology/thinking lead us to a more positive and better society? I leave the reader to have his own answer. I shall point out my answer in the following paras – these might be debatable and the reader is free to express her/himself in the comments – you might agree/criticize or have a different opinion but still feel free to express yourself.

WHO IS TO BE BLAMED?

We, The People of India.

WHY?

Because,

·     majority of us do not take responsibility – we try and find a scape goat for every wrong that happens to/around us. We cannot be wrong, at all. How many of us are willing to accept that we started taking things easily and went back to Pre-COVID normal life without realizing that the threat has not yet gone? Similarly, neither our central government nor our state governments have realized that they have made mistake in dealing with this pandemic.

We need to learn to accept our mistakes and take necessary action/s towards improvement and stop blame game.

·      we are selfish – we are not concerned about the society. We just want the well being of our own self/family – the society is not important. Today, we are screaming that the medical infrastructure of the country is ill-equipped but tell me this infrastructure used to look great just a year back. It was sufficient – yes it was but only for those who could afford. What about those who are poor? Today we scream because the rich with all the money (black or white) are not able to save the life of their loved ones or are going through gross pain in getting medical facilities. Had it been restricted to just the poor – I don’t know how many voices would have come up.

We need to have empathy for each other, irrespective of whether s/he is rich/poor. Only then can we really strategies and plan for development since development is only there when the basic needs of each and every national is fulfilled otherwise it is nothing but hollow.

·       we are majorly corrupt – barring a few. How many of us pay our taxes/dues with honesty? Our population is very high therefore in percentage people who are not corrupt might be in decimal. We are ready to buy things at premium when the need is there but would not give our complete dues to help build a better society. This attitude of ours is played with when the need is really high – I read in one of my WhatsApp group that the drug Tocilizumab was being sold for as high as 3 Lacs for one dose (I do not take the responsibility of this figure as it is what I read – I haven’t personally been offered). This is only because the corruption is in our culture – and we are party to it. This corruption did not originate during COVID times – it’s there in our blood. Right from paying that extra money to jump the queue to getting a job at a premium – We, The People are party to the corruption that exists in our country.  

We need to learn to live on merit and not find a short cut by corrupting others for our benefits. This attitude has to change only then would we end up paying the right price for the things that we want or buy. Because otherwise again those who pay a premium would get the stuff but imagine if there are others who are ready to pay more than you?

·       we don’t believe in science completely. We as a society are still believing more in religion than science. There is no harm in having faith and belief in one’s religion but not accepting science is something that could lead to a disaster. Till the second wave people were questioning the vaccine – some even went on to say that this is a BJP vaccine. What crap? Today people are willing to get a jab but before the situation got critical, people were reluctant.

We need to move with time – don’t take science as a competitor for religion – let them go parallel and do the needful.

·       we follow individuals and not the system – in fact I doubt if we have a system in place. When we exercise our vote, majority of us vote for the individual for whatever reason but how many of us really understand what the country really needs and vote accordingly. The nation elected the current Prime Minister with clear margin – how can a few individuals ask for his resignation when he alone is not to be blamed. He did not start the corruption in the country – it existed before he sat on that chair. Currently, it is only the people with or against the PM. One goes blindly blaming him and the other blindly supporting him. Due to people either following or being against an individual - no one asks the right questions. Seven years back this government headed by our PM promised for good governance and improvement in infrastructure – please ask him where is good governance? And where is the medical infrastructure even after one year of COVID and the experience gained from the failures of advanced nations like USA and Italy (& others)?  

We need to have a system in place and we should follow IT & not an individual. Chose the leader or party who can lead us towards development and not an individual because we like him or is an heir apparent. Also, learn to question and yes - the right question/s.

·       we love to show-off & spend more money on unnecessary things rather than Important ones. I am not against the construction/building of statues or the central vista redevelopment project or even the park beautifications in Uttar Pradesh that took place few years back. I have nothing against them but what I fail to understand is that why spending such an exorbitant amount on them when we do not have other basic infrastructure in place? The common man struggles to get the amenities to live a proper life but our so-called leaders spend lavishly on building monuments that would last beyond their lifetime.

Use our money wisely and learn to understand the value of something and not its price. I am sure that our future generations shall be thankful to our politicians if they build important things first and only after achieving that goal they spend on monuments.

·      Education – I won’t say much on this apart from – invest in education for yourself and your children and this investment shall give You the Greatest of Results. THIS IS THE BIGGEST INVESTMENT ONE CAN MAKE.

This is what I have felt and learnt in the last one year and this is what I won’t forget when this time shall pass and the time comes when we have to restart our lives Post COVID. The reader is free to express him/herself in the comments

Dua Maangne Wale, Soch Le, Sambhaal Payega......

I am a Hindu. Trust me it does not make any difference. Religion becomes immaterial when we ask GOD for something. It does teaches us a tried and tested method of asking GOD for something, successfully. Then why did I be so specific and that too at the very beginning. The reason is simple - I needed a start and I started with myself. The reader can change the religion as per what s/he practices. 

Ah! a new discussion, a new journey. You might have joined me for a discussion for the first time, you might have come back. The readers change, some come back some do not but the speaker will always be here. Sometimes the speaker becomes the reader. The discussion can be between anyone so why not with yourself. After all the speaker is also a human just like the reader. Humans - we all are humans and somewhere down the line we have a lot more in common than just a fact that we are humans. One such aspect that I intend to highlight through this discussion is DUA - Calling on our GOD for His Kind Help.

Let me start with a personal experience. When I was hardly 9 or 10 years old I got a chance to visit a very famous Hindu Temple on the outskirts of Delhi (Capital of Republic of India). I was surprised to see that people were tying threads to a tree. I asked my parents about that ritual as there were countless threads tied there. I was briefed that people tie a thread here for GOD to fulfill their Dua. But GOD wants us humans to be disciplined in life, so there is a catch here. After the Dua has been fulfilled one has to come back and untie one thread from the tree. I seriously wonder till date how many people have come back to complete the ritual or has GOD not fulfilled the Dua of so many of them. This is my point of discussion in this article. DISCIPLINE and PATIENCE. How much disciplined and patient are we humans when we ask anything from GOD? I have had a chance to visit many temples and have closely observed many people. Majorly people feel that since they have reached the Temple it becomes the duty of GOD to fulfill their Desires or Dua. Majorly people are not willing to even wait for their Desires to be fulfilled. "I asked for It so I should get It, if I do not get It then HE does not love me or I am being ignored. GOD loves my neighbour more than me or my sibling or my colleague but HE does not love me or I am not good enough to be HIS child." Delay of any kind is not acceptable from the House of GOD. OK, agreed if someone asks GOD for something, true to faith HE should fulfill the desire of HIS child. But have we ever wondered that are we even ready to accept what HE wants to give us. The question is, "Are we even ready to accept and enjoy the Gift that we ask GOD for" - "Dua Maangne Wale, Soch le, Sambhaal Payega." It is not a question. It is a simple acceptance from a man who himself is trying hard to be good enough to accept and enjoy the Gift from GOD. It goes without doubt that HE always gives us what we ask HIM for. Even if there is a delay it does not mean that HE does not Love us or HE is not willing to Bless us. The delay is because HE is preparing us so that we can enjoy HIS Gift. Parents never enjoy seeing their children in despair and Love to give them what they want. But they do prepare their children to become good enough to handle and accept the fulfillment of their own desires. The GODS are our Parents.           

19 Inches Diagonal

Successful - A word every human wants should be attached to his name. Without doubt it is important to be a Successful Individual. That is not what I intend to highlight in this discussion. The question that I ask is, "How much successful should one be?" You - The Reader might say, "as much as one possibly can be in his/her lifetime." Alright, if we agree on this then we should also agree on the fact that everything in this world comes at a cost. So, what is the cost of success? If you can answer this then I am sure this discussion is not for you but if there is any doubt or if the question makes you think even for a moment then you and I can carry forward this discussion. All the articles on this blog are a discussion between the reader and me. You are invited to write your point of view in the comments if you are motivated for a discussion. It would be my pleasure to reply to your comments (if need be).

The cost of success is undefined till one actually succeeds or fails in his pursuits. Questionable? Do you really feel that one can do a quantitative estimation of finding a cost of his/her pursuits before s/he starts or better to say before s/he finishes. Try it. Why do I say succeed or fail? Because neither success nor failure is in ones hands. So, depending on the outcome of ones pursuits can one figure out whether s/he succeeded or failed. The success that I want to highlight in this article is purely materialistic one. I would not talk about failure as that is something not many if not any would like him/herself to be associated with.

Coming back to the question, How much successful should one be? Before I express my point of view I would like to highlight what I mean by materialistic success. For someone - a new property, a new degree in education, promotion in office, a new venture in business, a new ornament purchased, a child born, a new toy given to a child, increase in the bank balance, an expensive mobile phone, a new car, a beautiful wife or a girl friend, a new friend, a new award, etc. etc. etc. Materialistic success is different for every individual. Now let me answer my question. In my opinion (and this is purely my opinion - the reader is free to challenge it by expressing his/her own) how much successful an individual should be depends upon how much success one can handle thereby keeping oneself and all those who are closely connected to him/her happy. Simple - Jobs done, discussion over. If only it was that easy. What do I mean by this opinion of mine? As we discussed earlier that success comes at a cost. We need to understand what are we paying to become successful? It should not be the case that we actually lose more than what we are able to gain. One tends to forget, in fact one knows about it but s/he ignores a fact that on the road to fulfillment of ones pursuits there are many other areas that are being neglected. The stronger the effort for achievement of pursuits the weaker certain other aspects of life become which at that point in time seem less important (only if they are less important). There is always a possibility that one gets so engrossed in his/her pursuits that s/he reaches a point of no return in other areas of life.

I would like to quote an example here. A successful businessman who wants to further grow his business so that he can earn more money starts a new venture. To work on the new venture he needs time and money as investments. Majorly people consider money as the only investment but they forget about time and thereby the Value of Time (VOT). Those who forget about time are the ones who end up losing more than what they seem to have gained. In order to make a new venture a success the businessman has to work hard and make sacrifices in other aspects of life. He cannot give same time to his family and friends and therefore his personal life is sacrificed for the sake of success of his new venture. He might even have to take time out of his exercises/sports. This will compromise his health. At the end of it the businessman might surely make a lot of money through this new venture but is at risk of losing on his family, friends or health (and there are more aspects that can be damaged). What would you term a situation in which one earns a lot, makes his business ventures highly profitable but has a son/daughter who does not listen to him, has no friends to talk to - all are materialistically attached to him or has a wife who is depressed in life? Do you call this being Successful? I agree that such a situation might not always arise and there are people who can handle all aspects of life beautifully. I am not accusing people here I am just making my point clear - Till the time you and all those who are connected closely to you are happy and have a genuine smile on their face YOU ARE SUCCESSFUL. The day you realize that your materialistic pursuits are taking away your or your loved ones happiness, I feel its time for you to rethink majorly. Because then you are going down and not up and you always climb the ladder of life upside and not downside.

That's it, it was that simple. Simple topic, simple discussion. To end this discussion I ask you - the reader a very simple question. It is my request to you to take out some more time of yours and reply to this question in the comments below. (This question was asked to me by my friend and colleague at Jaypee Group, Shri. Avtar Singh Saini Ji). He asks, "If one earns in 5 years what he is supposed to earn in his lifetime should he stop earning and start enjoying the money or should he keep on going for more earnings?" (The criteria to define the amount to be earned in someones lifetime is by increasing the current day earnings by 15-20% every year and one can safely assume ones working lifetime to be 40 years). What would you - the reader do in such a situation?

I will wait for a reader.

(19 Inches Diagonal is the size of the monitor that one sits in front of for a major part of the day, doing something or nothing. It was highlighted by a friend and colleague at Jaypee Group, Shri. Tarun Gaur Ji in reference to another colleague who just sits in front of the monitor throughout the day and has no recreational activity at all. Just the 19" monitor and himself - There are so many people like him today)             

GOD Lies in Details

"Moko Kahan Dhoondhe Re Bande

Main To Tere Paas Mein

Na Teerath Mein, Na Moorat Mein

Na Ekaant Niwas Mein

Na Mandir Mein, Na Masjid Mein

Na Kabe Kailash Mein

Main To Tere Paas Mein Bande

Main to Tere Paas Mein"

The time was 6 o' clock on one summer evening in 1996 and I was stunned looking at the notice board of School of Planning and Architecture (SPA), New Delhi. My name was not one of the few lucky souls who got through the entrance exam of that college, that year. A college that was not less than a Temple to me. A Temple I worshiped ever since I was 10 years old, a Temple I so desperately wanted to be a part of, a Temple that was then my life. Today, fifteen years thereafter I am an Architect and nobody asks me the college I passed out from. All that people want from me is my experience that I have gained following the basic fundamentals of the language they call ARCHITECTURE.

Today, when I look back, I ask myself one question. “Why, today, I do not feel the same for the Temple that I loved so much fifteen years back?” The answer was very correctly expressed in words by a great Architect. Ludwig Mies van der Rohe said, "GOD IS IN DETAILS". I believe "GOD LIES IN DETAILS". The details are the basics and with basics one can solve or create even the most complicated. The detail that I was missing then was that I fell in love with the Temple to reach GOD but I forgot that to feel GOD, I need to truly love GOD and not the Temple.

Yes, this article is not about me, not even about Architecture. It cannot be. This article is about understanding and enjoying the basics of life.

We humans have a tendency to complicate things due to our lust for achieving something very fast. The lust so big that it erases all our sensuousness. We should not let ourselves be depleted of sensuousness as it is the greatest blessing of GOD upon us. It is our sensitivity, our consciousness. It is important for us to enjoy all the small things GOD has given us. As I said earlier, with the basics at right place one can solve or create the complicated. The basics are always small; they are never big in size. That is why we tend to ignore them. Remember, we can feel GOD only in small things as GOD is small. GOD is small till the time we start believing and enjoying all the small basics of life and once we do that GOD becomes VERY BIG. But, what are these small basics?

THE BASICS

OUR DAILY ROUNTINE (Din-Chariya)

The most important basic starts right from the time we wake up in the morning to the time we sleep at night. What does this mean? This is very well explained by Ruzbeh N Bharucha in his book, The FAKIR. He says,"Every morning nature responds joyfully, gratefully and humbly. But look at human beings, how indifferent most of us are to the bounties of GOD and nature. When was the last time you thanked GOD for a beautiful sunrise or rejoiced with nature over the break of dawn? When was the last time you thanked GOD for giving you the opportunity to live another day and thanked The Sun for giving you its light and warmth? When was the last time you thanked GOD for allowing you to drink the cool, thirst-quenching liquid? Tell me, do you thank GOD when you drink water? No. Why? Because you take it as your birthright and you take water for granted. But see the way an animal or a bird drinks water. There is a sense of gratitude. You know why? Because they are not certain when next time they will be able to acquire this nectar of life. Thus, everytime they have water there is a sense of gratitude to nature and GOD above".

Life is so simple. Such beautiful lines explaining the easiest to follow basics.

NO GREED AND A CLEAN HEART

Look at rich people. They spend their whole life just earning money. Their aim in life is just to earn money and when they earn a lot, it is still not enough. They want more. Once they are on top they realize that money has given them everything but happiness. Then they start returning the money to people from whom they had gotten all that money from and they name it Philanthropy. But do they still get happiness, the answer is NO. Money can bring us power, with it we can buy everything but LOVE, FRIENDSHIP AND GRATITUDE. These earnings give us happiness because this is where we will find GOD.

Look at people who believe in going to temple every morning but if a beggar or someone who is not as high as them in the society asks them for something they only have abusive words to give in return. Does this help us find GOD, does this give us happiness? No, Not at all. The famous poet Bulleh Shah says:

"je rab milda nahateyan dhoteya, te rab milda dadduan machiyaan nooo.....
je rab milda jangal phireyan te rab milda gayiyaan bachiyaan nooo.....
je rab milda mandir-masiti te rab milda cham chidikhiyan nooo.....

Ve miyan Bulleye, rab onhan noo milda, ati dil-eya achiyyan sachhiya nooo....."

I would like to translate it.

"if GOD was to be found by bathing and cleaning then
frogs and fishes would have already found GOD.

if GOD was to be found by roaming in jungles then
cows and other animals would have already found GOD.

if GOD was to be found in Temples and Mosques then
the birds and the bats would have already found GOD.

Bulle, GOD is found only by those who are true and good at heart".

Do I need to say anything more?

MEDITATE

Have you seen a Formula 1 race? In this race every car needs a Pitt Stop. Meditation provides us that Pitt Stop. It adds fuel to our soul, replaces our worn out tyres and cleans all the dirt from our body and soul so that we can rejoin this world fully refreshed and rejuvenated. When we are refreshed we are at Peace and when we at Peace we are with GOD.

FIND JOY IN OUR WORK

For me fifteen years back SPA was not important but I did not realize it then. What was important was my work and to find joy in my work. Osho says, "One should work not to be recognized but because it gives you enjoyment in being creative". The joy is not in achieving something, the joy is that we desired to be creative. When we start enjoying our work we reach a state of Trance. Once we reach this state we are in sync with GOD.

LOVE OUR CHILD AND SPOUSE

Our child is a piece of our heart and our spouse is the one whom we have given our heart. Remember, it is our heart where GOD resides. We should never forget to Love our Child and our Spouse.

RESPECT OUR PARENTS,

The creator is the most powerful and should always be respected most. Similarly our parents who have given us birth are nothing less than GOD. Their respect and care should be the most important GOAL of our life. All we should expect from them is their blessings because these blessings have the power to ward of all the ills and evils from our life. I find the blessings of our parents in a line from the great Lata Mangeshkar Ji's song, "tu jahan jahan chalega, mera saaya saath hoga". The blessings of our parents are the shadows of GOD.

If we follow these basics I am sure we will be following the path that leads to GOD.

LIFE - A Gift

"HUM KO MANN KI SHAKTI DENA, MANN VIJAY KAREN

DUSROAN KI JAI SE PEHLE KHUD KO JAI KAREN"

I am a Hindu and I believe in my religion. It is believed that a soul has to go through 84 lacs life forms to get a human life again. A human life - that is the top most of all life forms. Why do not all of us, the lucky ones, utilize this life to the fullest? Human life is the greatest gift of GOD to us, we should thank GOD and respect the gift. WE ARE ALL LUCKY..........

Luck is not always on our side. There comes a moment in life when our mind is forced to give up. We are so emotionally low and surrounded by negative energies that we lose all the courage to fight back and win. The reason could be any, the fact is that even if a thought like giving up in any situation comes to our mind is a disgrace. We are born to fight, we are born to WIN. We have been rewarded with this human life not as a trophy for winning some tournament but because GOD considers us responsible enough to be on top. No matter what the situation is, we have to fight to win.

One such situation of giving up came in my friends life a few months back. She asked me, "WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IF I WERE TO TELL YOU THAT I WANT TO END MY LIFE."

I got disturbed. I thought I knew her well, so well that it gave me a shock. An energetic girl so full of life but all of a sudden wants to end it. Believe me, She was serious.

I always believe, "Jeev hatya is BRAHAM hatya"

What I told her then is immaterial but I want to pen down my thoughts on this. WHAT MAKES A MAN THINK ABOUT ENDING HIS/HER LIFE?"

It is either we are too dependent on someone or something OR we desperately want that someone or something to be dependent on us. When we reach a pressure cooker point where that dependency cannot survive any further we start thinking about finishing our life or the relation. To be Dependent means to be a SLAVE.

Slavery is the worst a man can do to himself or mankind. Slavery originates from desires, either lack of it or from uncontrollable desires, i.e. GREED. Like they say, Excess or Lack of anything Important is BAD, so is the case with our desires. When our desires get out of control we start breaching all the rules and think that we are immortal only to realize at a stage where the penalty for breaking the rules is so bulky in magnitude that we are not strong enough to face it. The best example I can quote here is of Adolf Hitler. (No point discussing this example any further)

There are people who are less important to mankind, who also think they are strong only to realize later that they are mentally too weak. MENTALLY SO WEAK that they cannot fight the battle when it becomes a WAR. People who either want to finish their life or a relation of importance are WEAK. This is TRUTH, Accept IT, the sooner the better. I once saw a movie in which a man who madly loves a beautiful socialite and marries her later commits suicide because she is constantly committing adultery. The fact that I am trying to raise here is that we should know what we are capable of and what we are doing or getting into. If we have control over our desires and think with a level head in the very beginning then we would be able to avert a situation in future that might be out of control. A student who is not good enough to get into IIT or HARVARD or even if someone is but is unable to clear the exams when he is there loses his control, spouse not adjusting well with us or our family, a failed mad one sided Love Affair, not able to stand on our exaggerated commitment, an idiot woman saying something ridiculous to us on a TV show and an even bigger idiot TV channel that airs it, the reason can be any but the fact is that we are a slave of our desires. He who wins over his desires would win the battle of life, he who does not would lose it someday for sure.

What is important is that we should always be ourselves. Being ourselves gives meaning to our life. It gives us eternal happiness if not the materialistic one. He who manages to be himself does not stands a danger of falling down and even if he does falls down due to any reason has the capability and courage to rise up again. This does not mean that we should not grow in life. We should always work hard for our growth with responsibility. GROWTH is very important for a man to keep moving ahead in life. It is a great motivation. But one should grow responsibly. My dear friend, Avtar Saini Sir, says "any growth that is above 15-20% a year is a questionable growth". We should always grow systematically whether financially or emotionally. Hurrying up in business, profession, in love or on roads can lead to an accident. BE SYSTEMATIC.

We should love ourselves (I presume the reader understands the meaning of true love..... stupidity by the name of blind love is uncalled for over here). When we are in love with ourselves we demand freedom. With freedom comes responsibility as freedom never comes alone. When we are free we do not dump our responsibilities on anyone else, we are always responsible given any situation. Only then are we free from slavery. We are now in sync with the beauty of life. One of my dear friends (name I cannot write here) once said to me, "We Indians (majorly if not all) are so desperate to have a son that we can go to any extreme to have one. When we have a son, we live all our life to make him grow and fulfill all his dreams but one day he might go out and leave us alone whether for studies or for a job. We forget all our desires and just concentrate on his. Why cannot we balance it? Why cannot we live a life where we take care of our happiness at all times in life and also take care of our children in a way that we are responsible for them today and are responsible for ourselves tomorrow. LOVE ourselves first, only then can we truly love our near and dear ones.

We should be alive throughout our life. To be alive means to be respectful, responsible, loving, lovable, independent, have a good sense of humor. I once read it somewhere, "REVERENCE FOR LIFE IS THE ONLY RESPECT FOR DIVINE, BECAUSE, THERE IS NOTHING MORE DIVINE THAN LIFE ITSELF". JUST LIVE.............

Lyrics from the great JON BON JOVI song says it all:

ITS MY LIFE

ITS NOW OR NEVER

I AIN'T GONNA LIVE FOREVER

I JUST WANNA LIVE WHILE I AM ALIVE

ITS.......MY........LIFE........

I am an INDIAN, Am I Not Corrupt?

So, you think this comes directly from the SRK movie? No, It does NOT. It comes from within ME. Me, who is the youth of this country, the future of this country, INDIA. "Mera Bharat Mahan", how many times have we said it? Many a times. But how much do we love our country? How much do we care for it? What all have we done for it? We say we are too small to do anything. Remember, everything starts from the basic unit and the basic unit of a nation is an INDIVIDUAL. The most important thing one can do for his nation is to live in a disciplined and responsible manner that is free from any corruption.

FREE FROM ANY CORRUPTION

What does this mean? Very simple. We should not be corrupt ourself and raise our voice against all those who are corrupt around us. I do not mean that we need to revolt, I just want to say that we should try and stop people from being corrupt in any form. STOP giving Bribes. This is where we start. He who gives a bribe is a bigger criminal than the one who demands it. Raise our voice against all those who ask us for it by denying it and compel them to work in a proper way. Right from the policeman at the red-light we jump sometimes to the babu sitting at one or the other government post, should not be allowed to pocket anything apart from his salary. This might slow down our work or we might end up paying more but it would definitely set an example for the person across the table to do his work in a proper manner. My dear friend Saini sahab says, "Save a little more to pay a little more - instead of bribes".

We pay bribes in order to get our work done faster or try and bargain for our mistakes. But this is not all, there is an even bigger EVIL inside many of us. The evil of showing others that we are stronger than them. In order to do this we play with the law by paying the protectors of the law. Our attitude has to change. We should respect our laws, make it a Moral Duty. Even more so try and get those punished who break them.

WHO IS TO BE BLAMED FOR THIS MESS?

The answer is, WE, ourselves. It is us who have not dared to raise our voice for so long and let the corrupt have their way. Right from the person who pays a bribe to the babu, to the person who pays a huge amount to a Pujari at any of the big Temples/Shrines to perform a better puja, to the people who use their contacts to get ahead in the queue, to all the people of the nation who accept the price hike in any commodity just because the government felt the need of it, to the people of Delhi who agreed to pay more in taxes just because our chief minister asked us to pay during CWG (that later turned out to be the biggest scam in the history of Modern Delhi), etc etc etc. are also responsible for corruption. The corrupt are able to have their say because we let them to.

LEARN AND ACT

We should raise our voice against all those who are corrupt. Learn from others. There is no harm in following someone who has proved to be correct. We need to WAKE UP. Wake up from this sleep that started ever since independence. One does not get independence just like that, one has earn it. IT IS TIME TO EARN OURS.

One of the important duty we need to perform in our fight against corruption is to VOTE. It is a MUST. It is our right and we have to exercise it. He who does not vote is a criminal without doubt. Vote for ourself, vote for our future, vote for the future of our MOTHERLAND.

EDUCATE OTHERS

All those who can read this article are educated people for sure. But what about those who are still living in a world without education, without understanding what is right or wrong. It is our moral duty to educate these people to realize their responsibilities and make them understand the games our POLITICIANS, BUSINESSMEN AND INDUSTRIALISTS are playing with them. We need to educate them because till they realize their rights they cannot live their life, they would only be living for others. SPREAD EDUCATION. TEACH THE POOR.

If we do this, we have played our role. There is no doubt that success would be ours, us INDIANS. I am sure majority of us do not want to encourage corruption but it only because of the few who are corrupt do we feel need to exercise something that is unethical.

DO YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO LIVE A DISCIPLINED & FREE FROM CORRUPTION LIFE AND EDUCATE OTHERS WHO ARE IN NEED? If Yes, then our country will surely prosper, but if No, then accept it that our future is not safe. If Yes, then you will convert the title of this article to an answer from a question. "I am an INDIAN and I am NOT CORRUPT".

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.